Pabst Snatches $124 Million Deal From Bud as “Exclusive Provider” for Kid Rock’s World Tour

Anheuser Bush’s big Bud Light mistake is panning out nicely for Pabst. The brand’s famous Blue Ribbon beer, otherwise known as PBR, will be the exclusive provider when Kid Rock comes to town.

It doesn’t matter which venue it is, how large or how small. Kid Rock has secured a Bud Light-free experience for people looking for the true anti-snowflake eveneing.

Bud Light Executive Director Joe Barron says the company is restructuring now to figure out what to do with the more than 5,000 barrels of product it had produced specifically for Kid’s tour.

“Unfortunately,” said Barron, “we’ll probably take a hit on those. Bars don’t want them either.” This reporter was eager to point out that this is often how the next dumbass story in a series like this gets started. “So be it,” Barron responded, “when in Rome…”

Senior Correspondent Dan Russel confirmed that Romans do, in fact, do Rome-like things while in Rome. Here in America, however, things are different. Here, when you go woke, you go broke.

“Romans don’t go woke nearly as much as Americans,” said Russel, “and in some places, people say they technically don’t exist at all.” The sentiment is often debated on the steps of very old buildings in the city.

Pabst says it will absolutely follow Kid Rock all the way to the Vatican if they must.

Related Posts

?SHOCK NEWS : Jenna Ortega Lost $120 Million And The Movie “WEDNESDAY” Her Actor Was Also “BANNED” Worldwide Because She ” ADMITTING ” To Sleeping With Diddy

In a stunning turn of events, actress Jenna Ortega is rumored to have lost a staggering $120 million in earnings, with the global broadcast of her hit…

15+ Understated Tattoos with Surprisingly Deep Meaning

People get tattoos for a variety of reasons, each deeply personal and often influenced by cultural, emotional, or individual factors. Some of the common reasons include: Self-Expression:…

The 2024 Prophecies Of Nostradamus Are Just As Terrifying As You Could Expect

The lingering prophecies of the famous seer and astrologer Nostradamus throw a foreboding shadow as we approach the year 2024. We have written extensively about Nostradamus before,…

100 Year olds give secret to long marriage

  Joe and Ann met in 1964Joe was a young soldier on leave, and Ann was a nurse at the local hospital, working tirelessly to tend to…

What’s Going To Happen With TRUMP

What’s Going To Happen With TRUMP So far this week, President Joe Biden has announced new steps to conserve land and water. He met with the cast…

ViraI Video: Mom Whoops Son With Belt On Side Of Road After His Joyride In Her BMW

When a teen took a joyride mom’s BMW, he got served some old school Texas style parenting with a spanking right on the side of the road…